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As a single girl, there's something about Sunday evenings that sometimes makes me question my lifelong commitment to never settle. I think about how nice it would be to snuggle up with someone on the couch, share a Thai takeaway and debrief on the weekend before the Monday morning monotony kicks in once again. On these evenings, I instead scroll mindlessly through Instagram and inevitably end up on the feed of one of those 'perfect couples'. You know the ones. She's smoking hot, he's ridiculously handsome. Their home looks like something out of Architectural Digest and their date-night outfits are styled to perfection. Speaking of dates, they're pretty spectacular, too. They're sipping on cocktails and feeding each other oysters at the latest trendy city hotspot (where I'm yet to get a table grrr). And I can only imagine the earth-shattering sex that happens the moment they step tipsily through the front door after mentally undressing each other all night. Green-eyed monster, you say? Guilty. Now, as someone who posts on social media a lot for my job, I know the reality. It probably took them 100 takes to get that perfect shot where neither of them was blinking or gagging slightly on an oyster. As for the sex? Well, maybe they were too full of steak and red wine when they got home and just passed out in bed instead. It happens to the best of us. Right?  Jana Hocking was surprised to learn the truth about one of her favourite Instagram couples This is what I tell myself on my Sunday night scroll, anyway. But recently I learned I may not actually be that far from the truth.  After chatting with a pretty well-know celeb whose Insta-perfect marriage was once envied by millions, I learned the shocking truth. 'We had great chemistry, got along like a house on fire, and our photos together racked up the likes,' she told me after a few wines. 'But in private, we never had sex. Intimacy was non-existent' Ah-ha, so I was right! Not everyone wants to get it on after a five-course degustation. But it turns out there was far more to it than that...  'He eventually told me he was gay, and I admitted I'd suspected it, ' she continued. This well-known and glamorous couple was the envy of millions, but behind doors it was a very different story (stock image posed by models) Read More JANA: Women reveal how they discovered their 'straight' husbands' had something to hide 'We stayed together for appearances for a while, mutually benefiting from the attention. But when he met someone for real - a guy, obviously - we called it off. I helped him come out, and now I jokingly call myself his ex-wife and gay godmother.' She even told me they made enough money off their influencer gigs to buy an apartment in Miami before he came out. So while the marriage was a bit of a sham, at least it was a good investment. While I was shocked by my new friend's confession, I know what happened to her isn't as uncommon as you might think. I've even written about it one of my columns before. And after another call-out to my loyal followers (who never disappoint) I heard yet more stories of women's agony upon finding out their boyfriend or husband was gay. One female follower went on a snooping mission and was shocked by what she found… 'I dated a guy for nearly a year and thought I was the problem. He was so sweet and charming, and we had the best time together, but every time I tried to get intimate, he'd flinch or say he was tired.  'Then one night I saw his search history "by accident" and it was all gay porn. He confessed he was attracted to men but had been trying to "date it out of himself". 'We never had sex and the intimacy was non-existent,' an anonymous celebrity confessed to Mail+ columnist Jana Hocking (stock image posed by models) 'We ended on good terms, but it took me a while to stop questioning my desirability. 'He also had this quirky obsession with a certain Hollywood heart-throb that was hard not to question. So the signs were probably always there.' Then there was the man who told me about the shocking depth of his own deceit: 'I've been married to my wife for 12 years and I genuinely love her, but I've always known I was also attracted to men. I never acted on it until a few years ago when she started travelling regularly for work.  'I downloaded Grindr one night, just to look. I didn't use my face just "other parts" like most of the guys on there. I figured as long as I kept it discreet, no one would know. 'Now, whenever she's away, I'll meet up with men, usually at their place or a hotel. No strings, no names. Just physical.' Beyond the deception, I was shocked to learn he was also putting his unsuspecting wife's health in danger:   'There was one close call, a bit of an STD scare that had me panicking while waiting on test results. That made me tighten up the rules. No risky play and always use protection. 'But honestly, I don't feel guilty. I feel conflicted, sure, but I still show up in my marriage. I just keep this part of me separate, because I don't think she'd understand. It's not the kind of thing you admit at dinner parties but I know I'm not the only one living like this.' I can't imagine the emotional turmoil of living a double life - but I also can't condone for a second playing with someone else's health like that. As for not feeling guilty? Well, perhaps he should.  Then there was the lady who changed her entire life after one kiss:   'Growing up in a strict religious household, coming out wasn't an option. So I dated guys. Good guys. Safe guys. I even moved in with one. But the idea of having sex with him made me feel physically ill. 'I finally ended it when I fell for a woman at work. She kissed me one night at after-work drinks and I burst into tears because I'd never felt so seen before. I've been with her ever since. 'I still feel awful about leading my ex on, but I honestly didn't know I could be this happy just by living an authentic life. My parents still won't talk to me, but I've never been more emotionally fulfilled.' Of course, there are other instances where a gay/heterosexual mixed marriage is mutually agreed upon by both parties for practical or social purposes. Known as 'lavender marriages', these unions were far more common in years gone by - especially in Hollywood - but I was surprised to learn still have their place today: 'I dated my best friend throughout uni. We met in drama class and it was an instant connection. I knew he was gay, he knew I liked women, but we made an unspoken agreement: let's keep each other safe.  'It was the 1980s and our families were conservative, and being in a "relationship" helped us to survive. We even joked about getting married. 'Now, we're both out, living our best lives, and still best mates. It was weirdly the most supportive relationship I've ever had.' Here's another similar tale: 'My best friend and I had both been out and proud in the city we went to college, but when we relocated to a predominantly Mormon area for work, things shifted. 'It soon became clear that being openly queer would make life unnecessarily complicated both socially and professionally (we both work in sales so our reputation is everything). So, we decided to get married; it meant nothing to us anyway. We were already living together as friends and, honestly, it just made things easier.  'No questions, no sideways glances, and, yes, it has been much cheaper to go halves on everything from rent to groceries to health insurance.  'Years later, we're still "together" on paper, even though we're both dating other people privately. It might not be traditional romance, but it's worked for us and it's given us a quiet kind of safety that we're not quite ready to give up.' InstagramGrindr

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